Dear Spammers,

I don't know what kind of simple-minded sucker you think I am. You seem to have this weird notion that any mention of sex, racism, politics, debauchery, and possibly gambling will catch my attention. My friends and I are all intelligent human beings. We do not spend our days thinking about sex, sex, and debauchery. You know that bit about Britney Spears being one of the most popular Google searches? I assure you I had nothing to do with it. If you want to impress me, put up some intelligent spam. Go on, I dare you.