I wonder

I wonder how difficult it would be to build an airplane lavatory sanitizer. I'm thinking a built-in mechanism that, at certain times (when the lavatory is unoccupied and has been used so many times), locks the door, hoses down the entire thing with a sanitizing fluid, and dries it off. Oh, and unlocks the door for the next user. There would be some sacrifice in weight, but they're already making weight sacrifices to install those bed/seats in business class and widen the seats in economy. I don't think people will improve their aim anytime soon.

Nice thoughts over lunch.

A must try.

Sukiyaki udon. Yum!

I voted.

And I have a few beefs about the process.

First, I suppose this is my fault for preferring the absentee ballot, but the switch away from chads has made the ballot too cumbersome. The new ballots are printed on gigantic pieces of cardstock, but the font didn't get any bigger. The layout still sucks and it is difficult to orient yourself. This year's ballot required two pages and cost a whopping 3 stamps to mail. How does this make voting accessible? It's expensive and strains the eyes.

Second, the voter's guides (yes, plural in this great state) were not organized intuitively. The candidate statements and some measures were in one booklet, some more measures in another, and there was a third booklet describing two competing measures. The second booklet was so damn thick it made a satisfying thump when dropped on the floor.

Third, not all the candidates submitted statements. A large number flooded my mailbox with junk mail. As a result, my "to flog" list has gotten longer. It now includes candidates who don't bother with statements, candidates who send junk mail (and especially those who sent junk mail but wrote no statement), and candidates who submitted statements littered with grammatical errors or failed to make their point.

Fourth, statements about measures and propositions should be concise. To the school district, I say that I don't want to flip through endless double-spaced pages wherein you tell me about every single little flaw in every school building. So there is a crack in the wall. Tell me once. Do not tell me once for every school in the district.

Thoughts on the latest presidential debate.

I missed the first half of it because I had to work late. The rest of it made me dizzy because the camera decided to follow the candidates. I had to give up and watch "The Simpsons". I might try to catch the next debate, but because its also a town-hall format it will probably make me dizzy again.

Last night's VP debate

A more general discussion that answers J's comment.

The debate was a pretty good one, I thought, especially considering I've never really sat through one before. It was interesting enough that I didn't end up flipping to "The Simpsons". Cheney had the calmer demeanor, but then, I would have liked to see more split-screen shots. Edwards took sips from his mug quite often; Cheney was a camel by comparison. I don't believe there was a clear winner. (I also don't particularly care about your politics; I will not let that influence my judgement about the quality of the debate.)

I still don't like either candidate. I still don't hate either candidate enough to vote for either one. I still don't hate both candidates enough to vote for Nader. At least there are plenty of local propositions to keep me occupied this election season.

Tonight's VP Debate

I will try to watch it, after all. I will probably flip to "The Simpsons" at some point, but I will do my best. All because of my favorite quote from last week's presidential debate:

"It's hard work."

What do normal people do?

After repeated pleas for help with the donation drive, more people are gradually signing on to do stuff. But they are signing on for the trivial tasks, like putting up posters. No one is signing on to coordinate things like getting collection bins from the charities, which we need for there to be a need to put up posters.

I am sure if I asked them to take on something bigger, they would say they don't have time due to work commitments. I would tell them I understand. I would also be thinking that I have 10x more work than they do. And I will still probably be stuck with the bigger tasks.

I now have so much work that it is pushing out social commitments. I have to rearrange my classes and still skip some to boot.

I now have so much work that I don't get enough sleep. This is because I insist on squeezing in a little reading or television, anything to keep my sanity.

Hell, I now have so much work I didn't do the dishes this morning. Keep this up and the drain will get slimy and there will be a layer of filth covering the floors.

It's not for you.

J's latest reminded me of something that happened a couple years ago. Back then, a group of us went to dinner once a week since we were all new to the area and we wanted to explore the restaurant scene. Besides me, the group consisted of A1, A2, and D. It was A1's idea to meet for dinner, and A2's idea to explore dives. D and I share A2's enthusiasm for dives and A1's for eating.

That week, A2 chose a Mexican place just south of downtown. Admittedly, the place wasn't a total dive, but parts of the menu were quite authentic. We saw some interesting items on the menu, including either burritos or tacos containing your choice of filling. Included among the standard carnitas or chicken was something that probably translated to either offal or sausage. Possibly from a cow. A2 had learned French in school, and my command of Spanish doesn't include many useful words. We asked the owner/waitress what it was, and her only reply was, "It's not for you." Meaning we wouldn't like it. I'm sure our group actually would have, but she was insistent and her answer was well-worded, so we dropped it.

The dishes we finally ordered were fantastic, by the way.

This one's for the gEEks

I am looking for instructions for a peanut butter and jelly fab. Have never done the workshop myself (otherwise I'd have the instructions) but have heard it described several times over. Last night I heard it in gory detail for the first time. It sounds like a nice compliment to basic circuits, assuming you have some knowledge of IC manufacturing. It would be heresy to mix up the various oxide layers and get the reticle wrong.

I tried Googling variants of this phrase only to find many peanut butter aficionadoes and sellers of various baked goods and snacks. I found detailed instructions for the cookie fab, which is not the same thing.

The idea behind the cookie fab is to demonstrate IC manufacturing with cookies. A sugar cookie is the wafer. Frostings are oxide layers, and sprinkles are dopants. Etching steps require brushes and plastic knives which must be decontaminated and isolated to prevent cross-contamination.

With the PB&J IC is you start with a large cracker as your wafer. The first layer of peanut butter is oxide. Jelly forms the reticle. You use your finger as the etch step, already making this workshop superior to the cookie fab. Then you must remove the reticle, and apparently the most effective way is to lick it off. I would imagine there are sprinkle, chocolate chip, or raisin dopants, but the description kind of stopped at etch.

On the plus side, peanut butter is much healthier than frosting.

But what shall we name it?

The other night the "Iron Chef" aired a neat idea for the 3S. The idea actually came from the challenger's side. The theme was eggs. The challenger made a white pepper ice cream using some egg yolks. The ice cream in of itself sounds intriguing, but the neat part was the presentation. He whipped up the egg whites with a little sugar into a merengue. Then he shaped mountain-like mounds of the merengue and floated them on boiling water until they cooked through. To serve, he placed a round scoop of the ice cream onto the plate and pressed the merengue mountain onto it. Sort of like finding the treasure in the mountain. He drizzled fresh raspberry sauce on the plate and covered the mountain with an eggy custard sauce. I forget the final name of the dish. I wonder if it would flambe well.

Now who can I blame?

It's all my fault, isn't it?

In my world, 8 hours of sleep every night are necessary to function properly. It prevents excessive grouchiness and makes for a very nice day. But 8 hours of sleep also cuts into waking hours, which I need to do stuff like make a dent in my ever-increasing book working set. It has an odd habit of increasing faster than it decreases. This is all my fault. I wish I could blame other people, but it really is my fault. When I buy books for the book club on Amazon, I have to buy additional ones to make the free shipping limit. When I go to the farmers' market, I inevitably visit Books Inc. and their excellent bargain book shelves. And when Christmas or my birthday roll around, I am not intelligent enough to ask for much besides books. (Well, there is method behind the madness, which I won't divulge here.) During the gift-giving season, I feel like Baldrick. (What would he do with money? Buy a turnip. What would he do with lots of money? Buy a really big turnip.)

Which brings me to my point. I stayed up late reading a couple books. This caused me to wake up late, leaving no time to make a decent cup of tea. I instead substituted a latte and now I feel way too good. Wheeeee!

Another odd dream.

In this one, I was outside a house, possibly mowing the lawn. This house was clearly no house I've ever visited or lived in. There was loudish nondescript (it was distinct at the time, but I have since forgotten the tune, so it's probably one of many pop tunes) music playing. The music paused twice to let through the sound of a doorbell. I remember wondering how the doorbell could sound so loud and clear when I was outside of the house. I also wondered where the music was coming from and why it paused so distinctly for the doorbell.

I awoke to find my alarm radio going off, but neither the music nor the static noise (it's a cheap radio) matched anything I heard in my dream.

There's hope for me yet!

Or: that's your definition of hope?

I've decided I would make a good lawyer. Lawyers are suposed to think of every possible worst-case scenario and plan for it. They'll have appeals all ready to go in their briefcases even before their client is indicted. Stuff like that.

I personally am cynical and I worry about every possible scenario. I pick over details and nail down several possible gameplans. All of this to the point of frustrating the freer of spirit.

Meaning there's an alternate path for me out there that doesn't necessarily include engineering. Or trying to collect on insurance money for 3S. Or trying to convince grade-school kids that I'm cool, something teachers must do every day.

Being a rock star, historian, custodian, or friendly customer service representative were already out.

M the misfit

For some time now, I've been wondering how people meet compatible people of the opposite gender. Obviously I am doing something wrong.

It would be wrong to date an immediate coworker.

I'm not sure I'd want to hang out with someone I found in a bar because they'd probably enjoy bars, and I don't.

The bookstore is an expensive proposition given my weakness for the magazine rack. And I've seen many rather sketchy people at the library.

The coffeeshop isn't bad, except I have tried being wired all the time and it didn't work out.

A Magazine once suggested a pickup line that involved finding an exotic vegetable and asking the closest single how to cook it. I find this extremely creepy, and I would therefore not go out with someone who followed advice from A Magazine or hung out in supermarket produce departments.

The smoothie place is deafening. The chance of companionship is not worth my hearing.

The gym, perhaps. When I'm motivated to go. But not a sweaty freeweight hog. And not those guys who work out in front of the mirror. And not someone who leaves the machine settings on a heavy weight to try to impress the next person who uses the machine.

The windows are clean.

Well, they're cleaner. At least they have been rinsed off with a hose. The water washed out the dust trapped in the bug screens and removed the layer of filth covering the windows. Now the air coming through the open windows is gloriously clean. It makes the air at work feel disgusting by comparison--I thought my annual allergies were back this morning. At night, the moon is nice and clear, not the furry patch of light it was before.

Now if only the temperature would drop below 90 degrees it would actually be comfortable to have the windows open instead of having the air conditioner on. That sounds terribly bourgeois, doesn't it, fussing about the air conditioner and destroying the environment in the process?

To sleep, perchance to dream.

I think I may have sleep apnea. This will likely go unconfirmed since it's costly (both in money and time) to visit a sleep clinic.

I say this because last night I had the strangest dream. For some reason, I was idly milling about in a corner of a swimming pool. It was a bright, sunny day and the water was a brilliant shade of blue thanks to the pool. I was bobbing up and down with my eyes open. Once in a while, I'd duck low enough for the water to come over my head as this is very refreshing on a hot day.

Normally when you submerge yourself underwater, you hold your breath. Otherwise your sinuses fill up with chlorinated water. When I hold my breath underwater, the sensation I get is of water in my nose that stops just short of the sinuses.

Interestingly enough, in my dream, I was holding my breath properly and the water was stopping short of my sinuses. And I could feel this happening.

Guess what I'm thinking.

A proper cup of tea should not be chunky.

People I should be allowed to flog.

1. Aggressive drivers.
2. People who drive under the speed limit in the left lane.
3. Tailgaters.
4. People who drive while engrossed in their cellphone conversations.
5. People who turn, then signal.
6. People who run red lights.
7. People who change lanes without signaling.
8. Drivers who do not yield to emergency vehicles.
9. People who do not polish their presentations and make their point clear.
10. People who do not label their data.
11. Whoever created the sales policies at this housing development.
12. Neighbors who whine about ants and yet neglect to trim their yards and sweep up after their cats.
13. Neighbors who take all the parking spots because they have too much crap in their garages.
14. Neighbors who stuff my trash can because they have too much crap.
15. People who do not pick up after their dogs.
16. Coworkers who do not fess up when they break the code.
17. Coworkers who abuse the budget, making it impossible for people like me to get the machines they need. Worse still, making it so we have to justify every pencil purchased.
18. Coworkers who unplug my machines because they are too dumb to ask for help.
19. Coworkers who do not respond to requests in a timely manner. (6 days is timely. 6 weeks is not.)
20. Ambulance-chasers.
21. People and their trial laywers who bring frivolous cases to court.
22. Bigots.
23. Political bigots. (You know, the Democrats who claim all Republican ideals are evil, and vice versa, thereby eliminating all possibility of civilized debate.)
24. Politicians.
25. NBC, for their coverage of the Olympics.
26. PBS, for repeating their endless nostalgia musical marathons over and over again.
27. Whoever thinks redoing reality shows over and over again is a good idea.
28. ABC, CBS, NBC, and Fox, for their reality shows.
29. CNN, Fox, MSNBC, CNBC, and all the major networks except PBS, for failing to provide worthwhile news coverage.
30. Geraldo Rivera, for failing to provide any news coverage.

Tell me when you've had enough.

I think the left contact lens may be inside-out. Theoretically, one can tell whether a lens is inside-out by looking at it.

I can't tell the difference.

I spent a few minutes this morning flipping the right one in and out. It seems that flipped one way, it holds its shape more easily than the other way. This probably made it easier to install. Also, the left one seems to be having more trouble focusing this morning. But I am not keen on reinstalling my lenses today.

Contact lenses are definitely not a good choice for those grey, increasingly dark mornings.

I've said it before and I'll say it again.

Not the one about letting me flog people, although that would be nice, too.

The world would be a much better place if only all engineers were forced to study technical writing and presentation skills. With an additional course covering data presentation. I have seen many rules broken these past few weeks. Here is a sampling of what the presenters did not do.

1. Speak up over the drone of the air conditioner and other assorted fans.
2. Address the audience instead of the laptop or screen.
3. Plot data intuitively.
4. Add descriptive titles to their axes.
5. Put descriptive titles on their slides.
6. Explain their plots and data.
7. Use fonts and font sizes that are legible on the big screen.
8. Cut off people with long annoying questions.
9. Talk to their foils instead of reading them.

I should be allowed to flog them.